Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Randomize
