HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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