I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
