she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
