I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
