Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
you told grandpa to call you daddy
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
