i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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