I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Randomize
