Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
