shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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