It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
he had hair everywhere except his balls
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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