I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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