I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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