so that wasnt chicken after all
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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