You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
