I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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