Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
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