You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
