hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
she peed on how many people?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
