she is the kim kardashian of front butts
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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