I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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