You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize