Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
