i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
