Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
