Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
