FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
