It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
