was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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