Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
