My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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