so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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