I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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