You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize