My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
vagina is talking i cant
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
