Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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