I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
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