Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
