I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
