I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize