Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize
