new low.... made out with someone while peeing
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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