she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
