Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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