I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize