I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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