Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
