I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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