The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
