I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
My feet surprised me
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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