haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
